Prunella's Perfect Halloween
by Dead Composer
Summary: Everybody's favorite psychic rat girl in her own holiday special!
1. Chapter 1

Rated PG for violence.

Disclaimer: Marc Brown owns the Arthur characters. I am but his humble unpaid servant.

----

Begin Binky fantasy sequence.

Somewhere in the land of Oz, Scarecrow Binky is hiding behind a tree that stands alongside the Yellow Brick Road. He peeks out from behind the tree and gasps when he sees, high in the sky, the words SURRENDER BINKY written in smoke. Slowly and nervously, he tiptoes toward the Yellow Brick Road, stopping briefly to thank the tree that hid him. "Thanks, buddy."

"No problemo, dude," the tree replies.

Scarecrow Binky walks slowly down the Yellow Brick Road, whistling and glancing around for signs of danger. Suddenly he sees a shape lying on the road in front of him. It is Tin Man Buster, battered and groaning in pain; his arms, legs, and ears have been ripped off. Tin Man Buster looks up at Scarecrow Binky and says, "She ripped off my arms and she threw them over there! And she ripped off my legs and she threw them over there! And she ripped off my ears and she threw them over there! And she..."

"Just tell me which way she went," says Scarecrow Binky.

One of Tin Man Buster's arms, which is lying a few feet away, stands up on its own and points toward the west. "That way."

"Don't go anywhere, okay?" Scarecrow Binky advises his fallen friend.

He continues his journey down the Yellow Brick Road, and soon sees a figure off to the side, cowering next to a tree. It is Arthur the Lion, who is muttering to himself, "I do believe in ghosts! I do believe in ghosts! I do believe in ghosts! I do..."

"Hey!" Scarecrow Binky calls to him. "Snap out of it, doofus!"

Arthur the Lion looks at Scarecrow Binky and screams in terror. "A scarecrow! Aaaargh!" He then flees into the forest.

As Scarecrow Binky continues walking, he soon comes to a fork in the road,

and looks undecided. "Which way do I go now? If I only had a brain!"

As he deliberates, he suddenly hears evil laughter in the distance, and looks up in terror. Swooping from the sky in his direction is Prunella the Witch, dressed in a black robe and pointed hat, and riding a broomstick. "Hee hee hee!" cackles the wicked hag. "I'll get you, my ugly!"

Scarecrow Binky flees down the left fork of the road just as Prunella the Witch shoots a bolt of flame from her fingers, scorching the spot where he had stood. As he runs, the witch is close behind him. As he tries to elude her, he sees two Tibble munchkins coming down the road in the opposite direction, pushing a cart full of straw.

"Hey, guys, can you tell me how to get to Elwood City?" he asks the dwarfish little boys.

"That's it, right there!" says the first Tibble munchkin, pointing toward a metropolis of sparkling green towers in the distance.

"I said ELWOOD City!" snaps Scarecrow Binky. "What are you, deaf?"

Suddenly he hears the witch's laughter drawing closer, and looks over his shoulder. He grabs a handful of straw from the munchkins' cart, stuffs it into his mouth, and runs away after a quick "thank you". Before the Tibble munchkins know it, the witch is soaring over their heads. She fires a magical bolt at them, transforming them into frogs.

"I can eat more flies than you can," said the second frog to the first.

Scarecrow Binky is suddenly forced to stop by a large sign in the road which reads, ROAD CLOSED FOR NO PARTICULAR REASON. "Oh, no! A dead end!" He turns around and sees that Prunella the Witch is almost on top of him.

When she sees that her prey is helpless, she stops and hovers on her broom. "Hello, little boy! Would you like some fire to play with? Hee hee hee!" Without another word, she shoots a bolt of flame from her fingers directly at Scarecrow Binky.

"NOOOOO..."

End Binky fantasy sequence.

In the real world, Binky and Prunella are sitting on a bench in Lakewood Elementary. Prunella is rambling on about the events of her day, while Binky listens and looks somewhat bored. "...so I asked the guy why he was wearing a skirt, and he said he was a ballet dancer, and he asked me if I'd ever seen a male ballet dancer before, and I said no, all the ballet dancers I'd ever seen were girls."

"Hmm," Binky grunted.

"So I went to the recital, and the guys were ballet dancing with the girls, and they were all wearing skirts, and it was really cool."

"Ho-hum," Binky yawned.

"I think you'd make a good ballet dancer," says Prunella. "Have you ever tried it?"

"No."

"You should try it. I think you've got the right build for it. Well, I'd love to sit here and listen to you talk, but I need to practice for the spelling bee. It was really nice to see you, Binky."

"Uh-huh."

Prunella stands and walks away, then Binky gets up and walks off in the other direction. Soon he meets up with Francine and Muffy. "Hi, girls," he greets them.

"Hey, Binky," asks Muffy, "what were you and Prunella talking about?"

"We were talking about ball...er, ballistic missiles. Yeah, that's it."

"She seems to like you," Francine remarks. "She's always talking to you."

"Uh, yeah," says Binky a bit nervously. "Like, every chance she gets."

"Weren't you in Mr. Ratburn's class with her last year, Binky?" asks Francine.

"Yeah," the boy muses. "She sat next to me."

"She's a nice girl, but she's a little weird," Muffy comments.

"Why do you say that, Muffy?" inquires Francine.

"It's all that magical stuff she does. You know, fortune-telling, hypnotism..."

"Well, she comes from a line of gypsies. They do that sort of thing."

"They put curses on people, too." Muffy's statement causes Binky to wince.

"You don't believe any of that stuff is real, do you?" asks Francine.

"Of course not," says Muffy haughtily. "I'm much too enlightened to believe in those superstitions."

"What about you, Binky?" asks Francine.

"Me?" Binky doesn't sound too sure of himself. "Ha! If she tried to put a curse on me, it would...uh, what kind of curse are we talking about here?"

"Wait, I've got one." Muffy waves her fingers at Binky. "I curse you, Binky Barnes, that your zipper will open by itself every five minutes!" Francine and Binky laugh.

"Okay, I've got a good one." Francine waves her fingers at Muffy. "I curse you, Muffy Crosswire, that your hair will grow shorter instead of longer, until you are completely bald!"

Binky laughs. "Bald Muffy! I wanna see that!"

"That was unkind, Francine Frensky," says Muffy indignantly.

Francine shrugs. "Hey, it's only a curse. It's not like it's actually gonna happen."

"Well, it's the thought that counts."

Binky, Francine, and Muffy walk through the school exit and down the steps. "There's my limo," says Muffy, pointing toward the curb.

"See you later, Muffy," says Francine, waving. "And remember--hair today, gone tomorrow."

Francine giggles as she and Binky walk in separate directions, and Muffy climbs into her limo. Binky suddenly stops, looks down, and fastens his zipper.

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

The same day, after school. Prunella and her sister Rubella are at the mall, shopping for Halloween decorations. They walk into a store called So Scary You'll Puke. A large sign says, "Two Days until Halloween." Prunella points to a life-sized, grotesque zombie statue. "Let's get that one!" she suggests.

Rubella examines it closely. "No, I don't think so--unless you want to throw off the feng shui completely."

The two girls start browsing through the shelves of Halloween masks. "These don't look convincing at all," Rubella remarks.

Prunella covers half of her face with a white mask. "I am The Phantom! Muwahahahaha!"

"It doesn't fit your nose," says Rubella.

In a nearby aisle, Mr. and Mrs. Armstrong and their daughter, Sue Ellen, are browsing the costumes. "These are really cool," says the little cat girl, "but why do they put blood and stuff on the faces?"

"That's to make them look scary, dear," replies her mother.

"They don't scare me." Sue Ellen sees an item that intrigues her. "Wait, look at this!"

A child-size black ninja costume hangs on a rack before her. She grabs it, but Prunella, who has wandered into the aisle, takes hold of it at the same time. They struggle over it briefly.

"Let go!" Prunella demanded. "I touched it first!"

"No, you didn't!" Sue Ellen insists.

Prunella yanks the costume from Sue Ellen's hand, then pulls it off the rack and examines it. "Six years," she observes. "Oh, well, it's too small for both of us." She replaces the costume on the rack.

"People are rude in America," Sue Ellen remarks to her parents.

"You're not from America?" says the surprised Prunella.

"We're Americans," Mr. Armstrong answers, "but this is her first time in this country. We've been living overseas."

Mrs. Armstrong sorts through the other ninja costumes, and pulls one out. "Here's one your size, Sue Ellen."

"She likes anything to do with martial arts," Mr. Armstrong goes on. "She's quite an avid tae kwon do student."

"My name's Sue Ellen Armstrong," says the red-haired girl, extending her hand.

Prunella shakes hands with her. "I'm Prunella Prufrock. It's nice to meet

you. And you really do have a strong arm."

Sue Ellen tries to withdraw her hand, but Prunella grips it and examines the palm. "Hmm...that's a peculiar line," she mutters. "It means either that something precious to you will be destroyed in a fire, or you will...get your goose cooked?"

"What are you talking about?" asks Sue Ellen.

"I read palms," Prunella explains. "I'm not very good at it yet, but Rubella is teaching me everything."

"That's me," says her sister, who has just appeared in the aisle. "I'm Rubella. I'm a fortune-teller. She grabs a card from her pocket and hands it to Mr. Armstrong.

"And I'm a diplomat," says the cat man.

"And I'm a homemaker," says his wife. "Except we don't have a home here yet, but we're looking for one."

"There's one for sale on Third and Bradley," Rubella tells her.

"If you live in that one, then you can go to my school!" Prunella tells Sue Ellen.

"Awesome!" says the little girl. "Can we, Mom?"

"We'll see, dear."

"I don't see anything in this store I want," says Rubella. "Shall we go, Prunie?"

"Yeah, let's." Prunella waves at her new friend. "It was nice to meet you, Sue Ellen."

As the two rat girls search the mall for another Halloween store, Prunella remarks, "Such a nice girl. It'd be a shame if she ended up in The Rat's class."

Suddenly Rubella stops walking and places her fingers on her temples.

"What? Are you picking up something?"

Rubella responds in a trance-like tone of voice. "Someone is talking about you..."

TBC


	3. Chapter 3

At the exact same time, Arthur, Buster, Francine, Muffy, Binky, Brain, and Fern are gathered in the Read family living room. The walls are decorated with cobwebs, plastic bats, and paper skeletons. "Wait, guys," Binky says to the group. "Don't you think something like that might...make her angry?"

"What's so bad about that?" asks Brain.

"Well...she might, like, do something to us."

"Like what, put a curse on us?" jokes Fern. All the kids laugh except for Binky, who turns around and fastens his zipper.

"So here's what I'm thinking," says Francine. "How much do we really know about Prunella?

"Not much," says Arthur, "except she's a fourth-grader."

"And she was in my class last year," Binky adds.

"Now wait a minute," says Francine. "How do we know she's a fourth-grader?"

"Uh...because she was a third-grader last year?" Buster points out.

"That doesn't prove anything," says Muffy. "Just look at Binky."

"Don't look at me," Binky retorts.

"Think about it," Francine muses. "Have we ever met anyone else from her fourth-grade class?"

"Come to think of it, no," Brain realizes.

"Me neither," adds Arthur.

"Exactly," says Francine in a spooky voice. "Maybe she doesn't have a fourth-grade class. Maybe she's not even a student. Maybe...she's something else entirely."

"An alien!" suggests Buster.

"Saw that one coming," says Fern.

"A spy?" Brain proposes.

"Who would she spy for?" Muffy wonders. "Mighty Mountain?"

"A robot!" Binky chimes in.

Fern extends her arms. "I...am...Mechaprunella..."

"A superhero?" Arthur wonders.

Francine waves her hands. "Okay, okay. She's none of the above. She's a demon from the legions of the undead. She's a bloodsucking creature of the night!"

"The word you're looking for is vampire, Francine," says Brain.

"Duh, Brain."

"Prunella's a vampire?" Buster marvels. "Cool! Can I be one too?"

"I vant to suck your ice cream!" says Muffy mockingly.

"No, Buster," says Francine, "she's not really a vampire. It's part of our joke. Now here's what we do..."

The next morning, the children are arriving at Lakewood Elementary. Prunella opens her locker and finds a note lying inside. She picks it up and unfolds it. The crude handwriting says, WE KNOW YOUR A VAMPIRE.

She glances around, wondering who might have left the poorly spelled note...

TBC


	4. Chapter 4

It is the morning of the day before Halloween. Prunella is wandering down the hall on the way to her class. In front of her, Arthur, Buster, and Francine are chatting. Francine looks up and sees Prunella approaching. "Here she comes!"

As Prunella walks behind them, Arthur starts to talk loudly. "But you don't need a wooden stake. A metal stake will kill a vampire just as easily."

The rat girl stops and listens to what the three kids are saying. "I read that you can also kill a vampire by filling the mouth with garlic and cutting off the head," says Buster.

"Don't forget holy water," Prunella chimes in.

Arthur, Buster, and Francine turn toward Prunella with phony looks of astonishment.

"You can kill a vampire by dousing it with holy water," she reminds them.

"Oh, yeah," says Francine. "That's right, you can. Uh...does it make a difference

whether the holy water is Catholic or Jewish?"

"That depends on whether the vampire is Catholic or Jewish," Prunella answers. "If it's a Mormon vampire, you can kill it by spraying it with Pepsi."

"We should be writing all this down," suggests Arthur.

"Are you expecting an attack from vampires?" asks Prunella.

Uh, well, we heard a rumor that one of the kids in the school is really a vampire," says Buster. "It's probably just a rumor, but, as the Boy Scouts say, it doesn't hurt to be prepared.

"There's one other way to kill a vampire," says Francine when she sees Muffy walking up to the group.

"What's that?" asks Prunella.

Muffy raises a defiant fist. "Call Muffy...the Vampire Slayer!"

Begin Muffy fantasy sequence.

It's a boring day in Mr. Ratburn's third-grade class, as the teacher lectures about the price of tea in China. Everything seems normal, except for the presence of Prunella in one of the chairs. "Now if you go to the Guangdong province then the price of tea goes down, but so does the quality..." Mr. Ratburn drones.

Muffy raises her hand. "Yes, Muffy?" the teacher acknowledges her.

"Excuse me," says the monkey girl, "but does anyone else notice anything unusual about today's class?"

Mr. Ratburn glances around, then rests his eyes on Prunella. "For the last time, Prunella, you are not a third-grader!" he chides her.

Suddenly Prunella leaps from her chair halfway across the room, tackles Mr. Ratburn, and lands with him behind the teacher's desk. The kids gasp and try to look over the desk to see what is happening.

Seconds later, Prunella and Mr. Ratburn emerge from behind the desk...and they are both fanged vampires!

All the kids, except Muffy, scream in terror. Muffy leaps onto the top of her table and pulls two pointed, wooden stakes from inside her blouse. "Get down, everybody!" she orders the other kids. To the vampires she yells, "Eat stake, bloodsuckers!"

There follows a spectacular fight sequence betwen Muffy and the two vampires, which ends when Muffy hurls her stakes at them, and they crumble into dust. Muffy stands on the teacher's desk and raises her arms proudly. "Yay, Muffy!" the kids cheer. "Hooray for The Slayer!"

Suddenly the door to the classroom bursts open, and Rodentia Ratburn rushes in. When she sees the pile of dust that was once her brother, she screams in anger and terror...and we see that she is an even more fearsome-looking vampire.

"It's Rodentia!" cries Brain. "The Vampire Queen!"

Muffy reaches into her blouse but finds nothing. "I'm out of stakes!" She then asks Rodentia, "Are you Catholic or Jewish?"

End Muffy fantasy sequence.

"Wasn't that fantasy a little violent, Muffy?" asks Arthur.

"It's one day until Halloween, Arthur," says Muffy. "Get in the holiday spirit, will you?"

Several minutes later, the kids have gathered in Mr. Ratburn's third-grade class. "This being the day before Halloween," says the teacher, "I believe Miss Crosswire has an announcement for the class."

Muffy stands up in front of the other kids. "Tomorrow night at 8 p.m., you are all cordially invited..."

Her announcement is interrupted when the voice of Principal Haney is heard over the public address speaker. "Muwahahahaha! I am the ghost of Principal Haney! I have returned from the grave to take revenge on you all! You are all doomed! Doooooomed! Muwahahaha! If you think this is scary, just wait until tomorrow! Muwahahaha..."

The speaker crackles and falls silent. "Somebody stop that man before he breathes again," grumbles the annoyed Muffy.

She then goes on with her spiel. "Tomorrow night at 8 p.m., you are all cordially invited to visit...THE CROSSWIRE TUNNEL OF TERROR! MUWAHAHAHAHAHA! Located directly through the front door of the Crosswire mansion. Be there...if you dare!"

Muffy sits down, and Mr. Ratburn again addresses the class. "Thank you, Muffy. I'd love to come, but you know how claustrophobic I am. Now, would anybody else like to let loose with an evil laugh before we get started?"

Binky raises his hand.

"Yes, Binky?"

"What's 'cordially'?"

TBC


	5. Chapter 5

Later that day, Mr. Ratburn is presenting a Halloween puppet show to the assembled Lakewood students. As the curtain opens, he narrates from above the puppet stage. "21st Century Rat presents...Bionic Bunny versus Count Darkula!" The children applaud and cheer excitedly.

"First, a brief disclaimer," says the teacher/puppeteer. "I don't own Bionic Bunny, but I do own Count Darkula. Now, on with the show!"

In the dim light of the auditorium we see Binky and Prunella sitting next to each other near the front row. Binky seems uncomfortable with the fact that Prunella is sitting next to him. "If only The Rat's lessons were as entertaining as his puppet shows," Prunella remarks.

"Uh-huh," grunts Binky.

On the puppet stage, a rabbit woman puppet is walking along as Mr. Ratburn manipulates her strings. "I know I shouldn't be out alone at night," she says as Ratburn provides her falsetto voice, "but with Bionic Bunny patrolling the skies, how can anything evil happen?"

Suddenly the puppet Count Darkula, a fanged, robed rat vampire, jumps out of the shadows and confronts the rabbit woman. The children scream in terror. "Muwahahaha!" cackles the count, also voiced by Ratburn. "Soon you will become one of my undead minions! Nothing can save you!"

"It's Count Darkula, the vampire!" laments the rabbit woman. "I am doomed! What shall I do?"

As Count Darkula grabs her, a Bionic Bunny puppet descends from the top of the stage and lands behind him as the children in the audience cheer. "Unhand that woman, you unholy fiend!" the blue-clad superhero demands.

Count Darkula releases the woman and turns to face Bionic Bunny. "What did you just call me?"

"An unholy fiend."

"Oh...for a minute I thought you had insulted me."

"Your bloodsucking days are over, Darkula!" the Bionic Bunny puppet declares.

"Think again, Moronic Bunny," retorts the count. "You may have subdued the criminal element in this city, but your powers are useless against the undead!"

"Hmm," muses Bionic Bunny. "I knew I should have brought a crucifix or something."

"Look into my eyes," Count Darkula intones hypnotically. "You are in my power."

The Bionic Bunny puppet is transfixed by the count's stare. "Vision...getting...foggy... Resistance...weakening... Pauses...between....words.........getting..............longer..."

"Fight it, Bionic Bunny!" shouted George from the audience.

"Hey, no help from the audience!" Count Darkula protested.

As Prunella is enjoying the show, someone hands Binky a note with Prunella's name written on it, and he hands it to her. She opens it and sees the crudely written words THE VAMPIRE DIES TOMORROW. Pulling a pen from her bag, she crosses over the words, writes something underneath them, folds the paper, crosses out her name, and writes Muffy's name underneath it. She then hands the note to Binky.

"You can't hurt me!" boasts Count Darkula. "You need a wooden stake, or one made of metal!"

Bionic Bunny holds up his arm and straightens it. "My arm's made of metal."

"Curses!" grumbles the count. "You haven't seen the last of me!" Then the vampire puppet creeps into the shadows.

"Thank you, Bionic Bunny!" gushes the rabbit woman. "Because of you, the city is safe from the evil of Count Darkula!"

"Perhaps for now," says the superhero, "but he'll be back!"

The Bionic Bunny puppet rises into the air and disappears at the top of the stage. "Oh, he's so cute!" the rabbit woman enthuses.

The curtain closes, and the kids cheer loudly. A note lands in Muffy's lap, having her name on it. She unfolds it and sees the words YOU SLAY ME, MUFFY. She glances over at Prunella.

On the stage a new Ratburn show has begun, with two puppets. One is a small boy, and the other is a crow wearing a doctor's uniform. "I'm ready to tell you my secret," whispers the boy.

"Your...secret?" says the crow doctor expectantly.

The small boy looks out at the audience. "I see weird people!"

The children laugh, and then the doctor puppet looks out at them. "I don't see anybody."

"But they're everywhere!" the boy insisted. "They're staaaaring at me! There, and

there, and there..." He points at various audience members.

"Wait...now I see them!" says the doctor.

"Can you make them go away?" the boy pleads.

"Of course," says the doctor. "Curtain!"

The curtain closes. "Thank you, doctor!" the boy's voice is heard.

The lights come up, and the children applaud and start to leave the auditorium.

A few minutes later, Muffy finds Prunella sitting on a swing, and joins her on the other swing. "How'd you know it was me, Prunella?" she asks.

"Not just you," Prunella answers. "Arthur, Buster, Francine... It's like you all wanted me to figure it out."

"Oh," says Muffy disappointedly. "Well, do me a favor, then, and act surprised when we show up at your house tomorrow."

"I'll do my best."

"It was all Francine's idea, actually," Muffy admits.

"Muffy, I want to ask you something," says Prunella hesitantly.

"I'm listening."

"What would you do if you liked a boy for a long time, but he never paid attention to you?"

Muffy thinks for a few seconds.

"Muffy?"

"Tell him that he's big and strong, and everyone's afraid to fight him," Muffy speaks up. "He's so dumb, he'll believe you."

"Who is?"

"Binky Barnes, duh."

Prunella swallows. "What makes you think I'm talking about Binky?"

"If it's not Binky, then who is it?"

Prunella sighs and looks at her feet. "It's Binky," she confesses.

"What do you see in him?"

"I know, it's funny, but for some reason it's the bad boys who turn me on."

"How long have you...liked him?"

"Ever since third grade," says Prunella wistfully. "It broke my heart when he was held back. What can I do, Muffy? I know I'm too young to be in love, but I can't help how I feel when I'm with him."

"I think he's afraid of you," Muffy suggests.

"Afraid of me? Why?"

"It's the magical stuff you do. I think he's afraid you'll put a curse on him."

"A curse?" The rat girl shakes her head. "I don't know how to curse anybody. Neither does Rubella. Neither does my mom. What would give him that idea?"

"He's dumb, Prunella. D-U-M-B. Even for a boy. He's so dumb, if you told him that green potato chips are poisonous, he'd probably believe you."

"So what do I do?" Prunella wonders.

"Just sit down with him and explain to him that you only use your powers for good."

Prunella smiles. "I'll do it."

"That's the spirit."

"You won't tell anybody what I said, will you?"

"Of course not. I may be a rich snob, but I'm not a rich gossipy snob."

"Thanks, Muffy." Prunella gets out of the swing and starts to leave.

"Hold it!" Muffy stops her.

"What?"

"I expect a little something from you in exchange for my secrecy."

"What's that?"

"A little help with another Halloween prank I'm planning."

TBC


	6. Chapter 6

Shortly after school on the same day, Buster and Muffy are walking down the sidewalk somewhere in the neighborhood. On the street, Muffy's limo is rolling along slowly, following the pair wherever they go. "Does that guy follow you everywhere?" Buster asks Muffy.

"Yes," answers Muffy. "I should call the police on him. Now, here's what I want you to do tomorrow night. When you and the other kids are halfway through the Tunnel of Terror, and you see the pirate running his sword through the sailor, that's when I want you to stand up, turn around, and..."

Buster suddenly stops walking. He is close to Prunella's house, and he hears a very deep, very mysterious voice. Muffy doesn't seem to hear it, and she keeps walking and talking.

"Buuusteeerrr Baaaxteeerrr..." drones the strange voice.

Buster looks in all directions, trying to locate the source of the voice, but in vain. Muffy, noticing that Buster is no longer with her, turns around and goes back to him. "What is it, Buster?"

"Who are you?" the rabbit boy calls out. "Where are you?"

"Buster Baxter..."

"What do you want?"

"Who are you talking to?" Muffy asks him.

"Shh!"

"We are aliens from the planet Glaxidon," the voice tells him. Muffy starts to glance around curiously as well.

"It's an alien signal!" exclaims Buster.

"I don't hear anything," says Muffy.

"We will land in your back yard tomorrow night," the voice informs Buster. "Wait for us."

"My back yard?" marvels Buster.

"Yes, your back yard," the voice confirms. "Out of all the back yards on Earth, yours is the most sincere."

"Come on, Buster," Muffy urges him. "The limo's blocking traffic." Buster holds up a hand to quiet her.

"You may bring your friends," says the voice. "Whoever will believe you."

"What time will you come?" Buster inquires.

"Tomorrow night. Wait for us." The mysterious voice ceases.

"What was that all about?" asks Muffy.

"Aliens from the planet Glaxidon..." mumbles the starry-eyed boy.

"I think those ears of yours must be picking up radio stations, Buster," says Muffy as Buster walks slowly after her.

"They're gonna land in my back yard tomorrow night!" he tells her.

"Then your mom will have quite a story," quips Muffy.

"I've gotta tell Arthur!" Buster runs quickly down the sidewalk in the direction of Arthur's house. Muffy turns and goes into Prunella's house, where she sees

the rat girl holding a cordless microphone.

"That was great, Muffy!" Prunella enthuses. "Because of the low frequencies, he didn't know which direction the voice was coming from!"

"This will be so funny!" Muffy gloats. "I can just picture him trying to convince all his friends."

"You'll tell him before it's time for the Tunnel of Terror, right?" Prunella asks her.

"Of course. I wouldn't want him to miss it for some phony aliens." Then Muffy hears girls' voices coming from the attic. "Is that your sister with a customer?"

"Yeah," says Prunella. "A new girl. She just moved here from Costa Rica."

"Good," Muffy remarks. "We can use more ethnic diversity in this neighborhood."

In the attic, Rubella is reading Sue Ellen's palm. "You are confident...you are courageous...you make friends easily..."

"Uh, yeah, I know all that," says the cat girl.

"Well, that's all I'm getting from your palm," says Rubella. "Let's see what the spirits have to say."

The two girls are seated on opposite ends of the crystal ball table. Rubella waves her hands over the ball. "Speak to me, spirits...speak to me..." Sue Ellen yawns. "Wait, I'm getting something...you will soon go on a long trip..."

"Oh, puh-leeze," says Sue Ellen incredulously.

"Funny," Rubella reflects, "the spirits are usually more talkative around Halloween."

Prunella climbs the stairs into the attic. "Why don't you take a crack at it, Prunie?" her sister suggests. "I'm not getting much." Prunella takes her sister's place in front of the crystal ball, and waves her hands over it.

"Did she tell you about the long trip?"

"Uh-huh."

"Come on, spirits," Prunella mumbles.

"Got any fortune cookies?" Sue Ellen asks Rubella, who is standing nearby.

Suddenly Prunella's eyes widen. "I've got something!" Rubella looks over her shoulder into the crystal ball.

"What is it?" asks Sue Ellen.

"It's...blood!" Prunella intones in a quivering voice. "Tomorrow night...Halloween...somebody is going to get hurt!"

TBC


	7. Chapter 7

"The image is gone!" says Prunella, gazing into the crystal ball. "I've lost it!"

"Who is it?" asks Sue Ellen. "Who gets hurt?"

Prunella shakes her head in confusion. "I don't know. I think I saw you there, and me, and some other people, and then I saw somebody lying on the ground, covered with blood. I'm pretty sure it will happen tomorrow night, and close to this house."

"See if you can make it appear again," Rubella urges her. "We've got to know what happens!"

Prunella vainly waves her hands over the crystal ball. "I'm not getting anything! It's a complete blank!"

"Sue Ellen, are you sure you want to go trick-or-treating with us after what Prunella has told you?" Rubella asks.

"I'm not afraid," the girl replies. "Besides, I don't have any other kids to go with."

----

In the Read living room, Buster is seated with Arthur and D.W. on the couch. "They're from the planet Glaxidon," he recounts to his friends. "They said they're gonna land in my back yard tomorrow night."

"I think you might have heard something else, Buster," says Arthur skeptically.

"But they called me by name!" Buster insisted. "And I was the only one who could hear them. Muffy didn't hear a thing."

"Are they good aliens or bad aliens?" asks D.W. curiously.

"They didn't say. But I don't think they traveled halfway across the galaxy just to pick a fight with us."

"If you wait in your back yard all night," Arthur points out, "you'll miss the trick-or-treat and Muffy's Tunnel of Terror--not to mention that other thing we're planning to do."

"So what?" says Buster. "This is the event of a lifetime! I've always believed in them, and now they're coming to visit me!"

Begin Buster fantasy sequence.

Buster is sitting on a lawn chair in his back yard. Suddenly he hears a loud whining noise and looks up. Descending from the sky is a spacecraft about the size of Buster's back yard. It lands in front of him as he gazes in wonder. A hatchway opens in the bottom of the ship, and a humanoid creature descends from it. As the creature walks away from the spaceship toward Buster, it increases in size until it is about eight feet tall. Towering above Buster, it extends its hand and spreads its fingers apart in an alien greeting. "Have a wonderful kind of day," it intones. Buster spreads his fingers and attempts to duplicate the alien greeting, but with only partial success.

End Buster fantasy sequence.

"I was gonna ask you how the alien ship can fit in your back yard," says Arthur, "but I see you've already figured that one out."

"What do the aliens want, Buster?" asks D.W.

"I don't know. But if they have the power to travel across the universe, then we probably don't have anything they need. It's more likely that they have something to give to us."

"Maybe they'll solve all the world's problems," D.W. muses.

Begin D.W. fantasy sequence.

We find ourselves in a war zone. Soldiers on both sides have dug trenches and are firing at each other with machine guns. Suddenly an alien ship flies over them, firing waves of energy. The energy waves strike the soldiers and transform their weapons into Mary Moo Cow dolls. The soldiers look at the dolls with curiosity, then one of them starts to cry. "I feel so...so happy!" he gushes.

End D.W. fantasy sequence.

"So, what do you say, Arthur?" asks Buster.

"Uh, I don't know. The aliens haven't spoken to me, so maybe they don't want to see me."

D.W.'s face lights up. "I want to see the aliens!"

"D.W.!" her brother snaps.

D.W. runs into the kitchen, where Mrs. Read is cleaning the oven, and Arthur follows after her. "Mom, can I go with Buster tomorrow night to see the aliens?" she pleads.

Mrs. Read pulls her head out of the oven. "Don't you want to go trick-or-treating, D.W.?"

"I can trick-or-treat next year," says the excited girl. "This year I want to see the aliens!"

"Okay, if that's what you want to do," says her mother. "As long as you don't stay up past your bedtime."

"Mom, don't let her!" Arthur urges.

"Why not?"

"Because...uh...she shouldn't be exposed to extraterrestrials at such a tender age."

"What's extra...extra..." D.W. puzzles.

"Extraterrestrials," explains Mrs. Read. "That means people from outer space."

"You're just using big words so I won't know what you're saying," D.W. accuses Arthur.

"Arthur, if D.W. wants to see the aliens, I don't see why she can't," Mrs. Read opinionates. "It's probably less harmful than eating tons of candy."

"Yay!" D.W. cheers. "I get to see the aliens, I get to see the aliens..."

"Awesome!" exclaims Buster as he walks through the kitchen. "I'll see you tomorrow night, then. Well, I'm on my way to Francine's place to tell her the good news."

"See you later, Buster," says Arthur as his rabbit friend leaves. Turning to his sister, he says, "There aren't any aliens, D.W.. This is just one of Buster's crazy ideas."

"Are you saying Buster's crazy?"

"No, I'm not. Well, maybe he's a little crazy, but I guess we're all a little crazy."

"Then maybe he's telling the truth," says D.W. smugly.

"He isn't," Arthur insists.

"Are you saying Buster's a liar?"

"No, I'm not."

"So if he's not crazy, and he's not a liar, then the aliens must be real! Am I smart for my age, or what?"

"Aaaargh!"

TBC


	8. Chapter 8

The next morning, October 31, Halloween. The kids are gathering in Mr. Ratburn's class. Buster is seated near the front of the room. Francine enters holding a flying saucer toy, and starts floating it above Buster's head. "Searching for signs of intelligent life, Captain. Still searching... Increasing magnification..."

"Ha, ha," grunts the rabbit boy.

As Francine sits down, Binky enters and starts to give Buster a bad time. "Hey, space cadet. Still watching the sky?"

"You'll be sorry when the aliens reveal all their secrets to me and you're left just as stupid as before," says Buster defiantly.

Binky raises a fist. "Are you callin' me stupid?"

Buster looks nervous for a moment, but then gathers courage and stands up. "Yeah, I'm calling you stupid. What are you gonna do about it? The aliens are gonna land in my back yard, not yours. Because I was the kid who believed in them before anyone else did. And you can clobber me all you want, but it's not gonna change a thing!"

Binky is obviously anxious, but tries his best to look and act mean. "You just signed your own search warrant, rabbit!" he threatens.

"Kids, let's get started," says Mr. Ratburn, prompting Buster and Binky to sit down. "Since today is Halloween, I've invited a special..."

Suddenly the public address speaker crackles, and Mr. Haney's hoarse voice is heard. "May I have your attention, please. The winners of the Lakewood Elementary pumpkin-carving contest have been chosen. In third place, Molly McDonald, fourth grade, and her pumpkin called The Guy Whose...er...Brain Exploded. In second place, Vicki Dent, fourth grade, and her Henry Skreever pumpkin. And our first-place winner is...George Nordgren!"

All the kids turn to George and cheer. "Awright, George! Waytago!"

"George, a student in Mr. Ratburn's third-grade class, crafted a hilarious pumpkin called Aardvarks Are Funny," the principal continues. Arthur gives George a funny look. "All of the pumpkin contest entries will be on display in the center court during morning recess. Many thanks to those who participated. Have a great day...and try not to laugh too much."

The speaker goes silent. Mr. Ratburn has a disappointed look. "That wasn't scary at all," he remarks, and the kids chuckle.

"Congratulations, George," the teacher goes on. "As I was saying, today is Halloween, so I've invited a special guest to teach a lesson on spiders. Please welcome my very own dear sister, Rodentia Ratburn!"

The children groan dejectedly. The classroom door opens and Rodentia enters, dressed in a hairy spider costume. "Hi, kids!" she says sweetly. "I'm a black widow!"

After a lesson on spiders that seems to last forever, the bell finally rings. The kids file out of the classroom, and Brain starts chatting with Fern. "That was the cutest, cuddliest black widow spider I've ever seen," he comments.

"I'd like to squish it," says Fern.

Behind them, Binky grabs Buster by the arm and drags him into a secluded corner. "What did the aliens tell you?" he demands. "Did you see them?"

"Uh...nothing," Buster answers, "except they're gonna land in my back yard. I didn't see them, I only heard their voices."

"Oh, man!" marvels Binky. "Aliens landing in Elwood City! And in my lifetime!"

"So, you gonna join me in the back yard?" Buster asks him.

"Not on your life! I've gotta protect my tough-guy image. But I'll be watching you. Just in case they're hostile, ya know."

"Well...okay."

"Don't tell anybody what I just said, or I'll clobber you. Got it?"

"Loud and clear."

"And if the aliens don't show up, I'll clobber you."

"Uh-huh."

"And if you call me stupid again, I'll clobber you."

"Right."

"I really mean it this time."

"Yeah, sure."

----

Later in the morning, Binky is browsing the pumpkin contest entries. The first-prize blue ribbon sits next to a pumpkin that looks like a demented aardvark with a long nose and a tongue to which real dead ants are stuck. "Hmm...kinda reminds me of someone I know," he muses.

Next to George's pumpkin sits a gruesome entry that looks like a man whose brains are leaking out of the top of his head. Tough girl Molly is standing in front of it. "Molly, you've got the makings of a great artist," Binky complements her.

"Thanks, Binky. I only wish I could have got a hold of some real brains."

At this moment Prunella approaches Binky. "Hey, Binky, got a minute?"

"Yeah, I suppose so," the bulldog boy replies nervously.

Prunella leads him to a bench, where they sit down and talk. "So, how's third grade treating you?"

"Well, I'm getting better grades, but that's only because I've done it all before."

Prunella adopts a serious tone. "I wanted to tell you...you know about the magical stuff I do, right?"

"Yeah."

"And you know that my ancestors are gypsies, right?"

"Uh-huh," says Binky, getting squeamish.

"And when people think about gypsies, they usually think about fortune-telling, and palm-reading, and...and..."

"Uh, curses?"

"Yeah, curses. My mom, and my sister, and me, we never talk about curses. Curses are evil things that hurt people. Even if I wanted to put a curse on someone, I wouldn't know where to start. I never learned how. I only use my powers to help people."

"Really?" says Binky with relief. "Uh, I mean, that's cool."

"And I would never, ever, in a million years, try to put a curse on you, Binky. Even if I did, it would probably bounce right off, because you're so big and strong."

Binky's ego inflates in an almost visible manner. "I am? I mean, yeah, I am!"

"You're such a big, strong boy," Prunella gushes. "All the other kids are afraid to fight you."

"Yeah, they are." Binky sees George walking by, holding a candy bar in one hand, and calls to him. "Hey, George!"

"What?" George responds.

Binky stands up. "I just wanted to congratulate you on winning the pumpkin contest."

"Uh, thanks, Binky," says George, intimidated by the towering boy.

"You're really good with your hands, George," Binky praises him.

"Thanks," says George, who starts to walk away.

"I'm not finished with you yet."

Knowing the routine, George turns and carefully lays his candy bar in Binky's outstretched hand.

"Keep up the good work," the bigger boy encourages him.

As George hurries away, Binky looks back at the bench and notices that Prunella is gone. "Huh?"

The rat girl is walking down the hallway, looking somewhat angry. "Stupid bully. Why does love have to be so blind?"

TBC


	9. Chapter 9

Halloween evening arrives. The sun is starting to go down, and Buster is sitting in a patio chair in his back yard, munching from a bag of potato chips. Next to his chair sits a cooler full of ice and snacks. His mother, Bitzi, is standing in the back doorway, setting up her camera in case the aliens actually appear. "Can I get you anything else, Buster?" she offers. "A jacket? Something to read? More food?"

"Yeah!" her son replies. "More food!"

"If they've traveled halfway across the galaxy, they're probably hungry," Bitzi remarks.

As she goes back into the house, she mutters to herself, "I give that boy too much freedom."

While Bitzi scours the kitchen for more snacks, D.W. and Mrs. Read arrive in Buster's back yard. "Buster! Did the aliens come yet?" the little girl calls out.

"Not yet, D.W. It's not even dark." Buster yells to his mother. "Hey, Mom, can you get another chair?"

"Okay, Buster," came Bitzi's voice from the house.

D.W. takes a look in the cooler. "Hey! Fruit pops!" She grabs one of the treats and starts to suck on it.

"You can only have one," Buster tells her. "I don't know how many aliens there are."

"Take good care of D.W.," Mrs. Read advises Buster. "Don't let the aliens get her."

"Don't worry, Mrs. Read." The aardvark woman turns to leave.

"What did she mean?" D.W. asked Buster.

"I guess she's afraid the aliens won't be friendly."

Bitzi comes out with another patio chair, and sets it out so that D.W. can sit down. "But what if they aren't friendly?" the little girl asks.

Begin D.W. fantasy sequence.

Arthur and D.W. are in a long line of people boarding a gigantic alien spacecraft. Everybody is smiling, as if expecting a special treat. Suddenly Buster comes running up to Arthur and D.W., breathing heavily and holding a large book. "Don't get on the spaceship!" he frantically warns them.

"Why not?" Arthur asks.

Buster holds up the book; on the front is written, in large letters, TO SERVE AARDVARK. Arthur gasps in horror.

"What does it say, Arthur?" D.W. asks her brother.

"Oh, nothing," Arthur answers. "Stay here, I'll be right back." He steps out of the line and runs away with Buster.

End D.W. fantasy sequence.

"Don't be silly," says Buster. "Arthur would never be that mean."

"Hey, it's my fantasy," says D.W.

Buster throws aside his empty bag of chips, and grabs a soda from the cooler. "I'm sure the aliens are good," he says in a carefree tone. "They picked MY backyard, didn't they?"

As Buster and D.W. are chatting and waiting for visitors from space, Binky watches them from behind a fence on the other side of the street. He is wearing a bandanna mask over his face, and holding a pair of binoculars. "Nobody will ever know it's me," he said to himself.

Slipping into some bushes, he places the binoculars over his eyes to get a closer look. Suddenly his view is obstructed by a little girl and a monkey...

"Swiper, no swiping! Swiper, no swiping!" the little girl scolds him.

Binky rolls his eyes. "Oh, man..."

----

About fifteen minutes pass. The sun has gone down, bringing welcome darkness. At Grandma Tibble's house, several preschoolers including D.W.'s friend Emily and the Tibble twins have gathered for trick-or-treat. They are being escorted by Marie-Helen, Emily's French nanny. Emily is putting on a ghostly sheet with holes for her eyes and ears.

"Ghooooost Buuuunny!" she wails spookily. Tommy and Timmy, dressed up as Siamese twins joined at the hip, pretend to be terrified.

"Be careful, kids," says Grandma Tibble. "I want to see you back here in half an hour."

"It's a good thing we can't tell time," Tommy remarks to Timmy.

Suddenly the Tibble boys stumble and fall over, their costume binding them together. "Hey, you tripped me!" Timmy accused Tommy.

"Did not!" Tommy insisted.

Grandma Tibble sighs as the twins start to fight. "They didn't even make it out the door." She picks up the boys and sets them on their feet, and the kids follow Marie-Helen out of the house.

Relieved, Grandma Tibble goes to the kitchen to open the bags of candy she has purchased. Then she looks out the window and sees what appears to be a head sticking out of the bushes, looking across the street through binoculars. "Interesting," she mutters, then picks up the phone and dials a number. "Police..."

----

At Buster's house, he and D.W. are still sitting in patio chairs, waiting for the aliens to arrive. Arthur, Brain, Francine, Muffy, and Fern, dressed in Halloween costumes, come back to visit. In addition to their disguises, they are carrying flashlights, large sticks, and folded black garments. Arthur is dressed as a pirate, Brain as a nerd with horn-rimmed glasses and an upturned tie, Francine as a witch, Muffy as a fairy, and Fern as a zombie with white makeup.

"Arrr!" growls Arthur. "Shiver me timbers! Here be landlubbers who will miss out on all the fun!"

"Hey, guys," Buster greets them. "Love the costumes. Especially yours, Fern."

Fern extends her arms and lurches forward, mumbling, "Braaaaiiiins...braaaaiiiins..." When she reaches Buster and D.W. she turns around, heads back, and starts to attack Brain. "Braaaaiiiins..."

"Look at all that food," Francine marvels. "I was gonna save you some candy, but you've got enough there to hibernate."

"When the aliens come, don't forget to mention that Crosswire Motors is having a big sale this weekend," says Muffy.

"I won't," Buster promises.

The costumed kids turn to leave, and Brain waves goodbye to Buster. "See you later...space cadet."

"We'll show them, won't we?" Buster says to D.W. after the others had gone.

"Yeah," says D.W. wistfully.

Begin D.W. fantasy sequence.

Alien ships dot the streets of Elwood City. As the eight-foot-tall aliens beam their approval, D.W. tries on alien headgear, while Buster scarfs down huge amounts of alien junk food. A futuristic version of the Crazy Bus song blares over the alien stereo system. Nearby, Arthur, Brain, Francine, Muffy, and Fern are locked in a cage and wearing rags, not unlike the primitive humans in "Planet of the Apes". Brain gazes longingly at the junk food that Buster is eating; Fern is panting from thirst.

"If only we'd listened to Buster," Muffy lamented miserably.

An alien hands D.W. a sentient Mary Moo Cow doll. "My name is Mary Moo Cow," it intones. "I am fluent in over six million alien languages." D.W. smiles with delight.

The alien gestures toward the cage where the other kids are imprisoned. "What shall be done with the unbelievers, my princess?" it asks D.W.

She looks at them and scowls, and they scowl back. A moment later D.W.'s expression softens. "Release them," she orders.

The alien waves its hand, and the cage door opens. The kids run out of the cage, rejoicing over their newfound freedom.

"Except for my brother," D.W. adds.

Arthur freezes in terror as the other kids scamper away. He gazes at D.W. and the alien, wondering what his fate will be.

D.W. grins wickedly. "I've always wanted a big sister."

"NOOOOOO!" shrieks Arthur as the alien draws a laser gun from its hip and points it at him.

End D.W. fantasy sequence.

As Arthur, Brain, Francine, Muffy, and Fern are walking away from Buster's house, Arthur suddenly stops in his tracks. His jaw drops in terror.

"What is it, Arthur?" asks Brain.

"Uh, I don't know," says Arthur once he regains his composure. "I just had this weird, horrible feeling. It's probably nothing."

Muffy starts to unfold the black garments she has been holding; they are revealed to be a robe and hood. "Okay, guys, let's get dressed," she tells the others. Placing her fairy wand in her pocket, she starts to pulls the robe over her head. The others follow suit; Arthur has a bit of trouble fitting the hood over his pirate hat.

"Oh, I can't wait to see the look on Prunella's face!" Francine enthuses.

"Neither can I," says Muffy, putting on her hood.

The kids, now dressed in robes and hoods with eye holes, turn on their flashlights and walk down the street, a light in one hand and a stick in the other.

Meanwhile, at Prunella's house, Sue Ellen is carefully fitting a black ninja mask over her face. Prunella is dressed as a ballerina, and Rubella is wrapped head to toe in bandages like a mummy. "Now let's be extra careful," Prunella warns them. "If what I saw in the crystal ball last night was correct, then somebody could get hurt really bad."

"Why is it called trick-or-treat, anyway?" asks Sue Ellen.

"Because if they don't give you treats, then you can play a trick on them," Rubells explains.

"What kind of a trick?"

"Oh, I don't know. Burn down their house, I guess."

Suddenly they hear the sound of children yelling in front of their house. "What on Earth..." Prunella wonders. She and Sue Ellen hurry to the door; upon opening it, they see five robed, hooded children waving sticks and flashlights, and shouting threats.

"We know you're a vampire, Prunella!" comes Muffy's voice.

"You must be destroyed!" Brain bellows.

"Come out and meet your fate!" Arthur demands.

"Wh-what's going on?" stammers the astonished Sue Ellen.

Remembering Muffy's request, Prunella pretends to be afraid. "They think I'm a vampire! They've come to slay me!"

"They'll have to go through me!" growls Sue Ellen, who steps in front of Prunella as the five hooded kids approach the doorway, chanting, "Kill the vampire!" Fern, the foremost in the mob, shines her flashlight directly at Sue Ellen and Prunella, and waves her stick threateningly.

Then, without warning, Sue Ellen jumps forward, lets out a blood-curdling battle cry, rears back a fist, and punches Fern squarely and solidly in the nose...

TBC


	10. Chapter 10

The force of Sue Ellen's punch knocks Fern onto her back, and her hood falls off. "Ow! By dose!" she wails. As she struggles to sit up, blood starts to pour from her nose, staining her robe and zombie makeup.

Before the other hooded kids have a chance to register what has happened to Fern, the girl in the ninja costume charges at them, snarling fearsomely. They cry out in terror, whirl around, and run away as she pursues them down the sidewalk.

Meanwhile, the horrified Prunella rushes to Fern's aid, pulling out a handkerchief to wipe the girl's bloody nose. Rubella, still dressed in her mummy costume, comes out of the house and watches the scene with concern. "Do you need any bandages?" she offers, raising her mummified arms.

Moments later, Sue Ellen returns and watches as Prunella and Rubella try to stem the flow of blood from Fern's nose with one handkerchief after another. She casually takes off her ninja mask. "They won't bother you anymore, Prunella," she proudly declares.

Prunella glares at her in outrage. "Look what you did! You nearly broke her nose!"

"They were gonna kill you!" Sue Ellen responds.

"No, they weren't! It was all a joke! A Halloween prank!"

"A...a joke?" Surprise fills Sue Ellen's countenance.

"There's no such thing as vampires," Prunella tells her. "Everybody knows that. Don't you?"

Shocked and embarrassed, Sue Ellen runs into Prunella's house, her eyes filling with tears.

----

In Buster's back yard, Buster and D.W. continue to sit and wait for the aliens to arrive. "So, D.W.," Buster asks his young friend, "what's the first question you're gonna ask the aliens when they get here?"

"Uh...Who's Dewey?" the girl replies.

Meanwhile, Binky continues to watch the pair with his binoculars as he hides in the bushes. A car pulls up to the curb nearby. Moments later, Binky feels a hand on his shoulder. He looks up. "Happy Halloween, son," a police officer says to him. "I'd like to ask you a few questions at the station."

The bulldog boy groans despondently.

Not far away, Arthur, Brain, Francine, and Muffy are trick-or-treating at Mrs. McGrady's house. Muffy is talking on her cell phone, while the lunch lady is putting brownies in the kids' sacks. "And a brownie for you, too, Arthur," she says sweetly.

"Uh, you checked these for quarters, right?" Arthur questions her.

"She's all right, then?" says Muffy on the cell phone. "Nothing broken? No missing teeth?"

In Prunella's house, the rat girl is on the phone talking to Muffy, while Rubella holds an ice pack to Fern's rapidly swelling nose. "I'm really sorry about this, Muffy," says Prunella. "My friend is new to the country. She didn't realize it was a joke. She thought you were really going to attack me."

"Okay," says Muffy. "I just wanted to make sure Fern's all right."

"By the way, Muffy," Prunella adds, "great prank! If I hadn't been expecting it, I would have been totally blown away."

"Thanks," says Muffy. "Bye now."

Prunella hangs up the phone and wanders into the living room, where Sue Ellen is sitting on the couch, crying bitterly. "What's wrong?" she asks as she takes a seat next to the sorrowing girl.

"I'm so stupid!" Sue Ellen sobs. "I know nothing about living in America! All the kids will think I'm weird!"

Prunella gives Sue Ellen a handkerchief to dry her tears, and then Rubella and Fern

join the pair in the living room. Fern is still holding the ice pack to her nose. "Why did you hit be?" she asks Sue Ellen.

"I...I thought you were gonna kill Prunella," the cat girl answers. "I'm sorry."

"We weren't gudda kill Brudella," Fern tells her.

"What did you say?"

"Uh, Fern, maybe I'd better do the talking," Prunella suggests.

"I think we should start with some introductions," says Rubella.

"By dabe's Ferd," says Fern.

"Fern, this is Sue Ellen," Prunella performs the introductions. "Sue Ellen, this is Fern."

"Sue Ellen just got here," Rubella explains. "She's lived everywhere. Asia, Africa, Latin America..."

"In Africa there are people who believe in vampires," Sue Ellen chimed in.

"They do?" is Prunella's surprised response.

"Uh-huh," Sue Ellen continues. "Last year we went to Malawi for a few days. While we were there, in one of the villages a mob of people attacked and killed a man because they thought he was a vampire."

"Oh, that's awful!" exclaims Rubella.

"And when I saw those kids with their hoods, and remembered what Prunella said about somebody getting hurt..." Sue Ellen starts to cry again.

"Oh, I understand now," says Prunella.

"I dote," says Fern.

"This is her first time in America," Prunella explains. "As far as she knows, people in America are just like people in Africa."

"That's stubid," Fern remarks. "Beoble in Aberica don't believe id vabpires."

"I didn't know!" says Sue Ellen tearfully. "If I'd known I never would have hit you."

"Your nose will be all right, Fern," Prunella assures her. "You can make Sue Ellen feel a lot better by accepting her apology."

"Oh, I subbose so," says Fern reluctantly.

"In fact, I'll bet the two of you could be good friends."

Sue Ellen extends her hand, and Fern hesitantly reaches out to take it.

TBC


	11. Chapter 11

A short while later, Tommy and Timmy Tibble return to their grandma's house, still wearing their Siamese twin outfit. As they run through the door carrying sacks full of candy, they trip and fall again, and their sacks spill onto the floor. They start to collect the pieces of candy from the floor, but it becomes a problem to determine what belongs to who...

"Hey! That piece is mine!" shouts Tommy.

"No, it's not!" Timmy retorts.

Tommy and Timmy start fighting again, which proves to be awkward and difficult due to the costume that binds them together. Finally, Grandma Tibble draws a line halfway through the spilled candy with her foot, and he twins stop fighting.

"No fair!" complains Tommy. "There's more candy on Timmy's side of the line!"

Grandma Tibble once again picks up the boys and sets them on their feet. "No more arguing," she commands. "Now, let me get you out of that costume."

Moments later Tommy and Timmy are wearing their usual clothes again, and are wolfing down their Halloween candy. "It's too bad D.W. couldn't go with us," remarks Timmy.

"Yeah," says Tommy. "I wonder if she saw any aliens."

"Maybe she was abdicated."

"What does that mean?"

"Uh...it means the aliens took her away."

"I don't think that's the right word."

"How long have we been eating?"

"I don't know. I can't tell time."

"I can eat more than you can."

"No, you can't."

----

At the police station, two police officers are questioning Binky, whose bandanna mask has been removed. "...but I didn't want the other kids to know I was watching for the

aliens, and that's why I put on the mask," the boy explains.

"Aliens?" repeats the first officer. "Did you see any?"

"No," replies Binky, "because you had to come and drag me to the stupid police station. For all I know, the aliens have come and gone already."

"So you say you were wearing a mask and using binoculars so you could see the aliens when they landed in your friend's backyard," sums up the second officer.

"You asked for the truth, and that's it, scout's honor."

"And did it ever occur to you that somebody might see you, and think you're scoping out the place for a possible burglary?"

"I wasn't gonna steal anything," Binky insists.

"Maybe so," says the first officer, "but you did look suspicious."

"I'm not a criminal!" exclaims the worried Binky.

"Nobody's accusing you, son," says the second officer.

"We'll let you off with a warning this time," says the first officer. "I'll call your parents and have them come and pick you up."

"My parents? No way! If word gets out about this..."

"What's your phone number?" asks the second officer "You do know your own phone number, don't you?"

"Oh, man!" Binky groans. "I'm gonna be the laughing stock of the whole school!"

"You can let your parents drive you home, or you can go home in a squad car," says the first officer. "It's your choice."

Binky drops his head into his hands.

----

At about the same time, Arthur, Brain, and Francine approach the front door of the Crosswire mansion, still wearing their costumes. Arthur rings the doorbell, and suddenly the door swings open by itself, accompanied by a strange voice. "Come in, my friends," it intones creepily. "Muwahahahaha!"

As the three kids enter the Crosswire house, they see a large, cavernous opening in front of them. Tracks have been laid inside of it, and there are several roller coaster-like cars. The cave-like structure appears to snake throughout the house. "This must have cost several thousand dollars," Brain remarks.

"I don't care," says Francine. "I just want to see what's inside."

The door opens again, and Prunella enters, breathing heavily. "I ran here as fast as I could. Am I late?"

"It's eight-o-clock now," says Arthur, checking his Bionic Bunny watch.

Suddenly Muffy appears, having changed out of her fairy costume into normal dress. "Only four of you?" she marvels. "Where is everybody?"

"Fern's gone home to recuperate," answers Prunella, "and Buster, of course..."

"Oh my freaking gosh!" exclaims Muffy in horror. "I totally forgot!" Quicker than lightning, she picks up her cell phone and pushes a button. "Bailey, the limo! Quickly!"

Several minutes later, the Crosswire limo pulls up in front of Buster's house. Muffy jumps out and hurries to the back yard, where she sees Buster sitting and eating snacks. D.W., meanwhile, is arguing with her mother, who has come to fetch her. "Mom, can't I stay up just another ten minutes? I don't want to miss the aliens!"

"There are no aliens, D.W.," Muffy confesses. "It was just a prank."

D.W.'s jaw dropped. "What?"

Buster's jaw dropped. "What?"

"There were no alien voices, Buster," Muffy explains. "It was me, Prunella, and a couple

of bass speakers. I was going to tell you sooner, but I was distracted when Fern got her nose bashed in."

Buster's eyes bulge. "She WHAT?"

"I'll tell you about it on the way to my house," Muffy urges him. "Come on, the limo's waiting."

"You mean...they're not coming?" Buster stares gloomily into the night sky.

"You lied!" D.W. roared at Muffy. "You're a lying, lie-y lieface! You made me miss trick-or-treat! Now the Tibble twins will make fun of me all year!"

In a brief aside, we see the Tibble boys after they have finished eating their candy. Their bellies are swollen, and they are visibly nauseous. "Oooooohhh..." they groan in unison.

"I can throw up more than you can," says Tommy.

"Go ahead," says Timmy.

In Buster's back yard, D.W. is continuing her rant against Muffy. "I'll sue you, Muffy Crosswire! I'll sue you for every penny you're worth! As soon as I find out what 'sue' means!"

"Come along, D.W.," says Mrs. Read. "It's past your bedtime." She leads her daughter away by the hand, but not before D.W. sticks out her tongue and makes an ugly face at Muffy.

"Well, what are you waiting for, Buster?" says Muffy, pulling on the rabbit boy's arm. "It's time to enter...THE CROSSWIRE TUNNEL OF TERROR! MUWAHAHAHAHA!"

"If it's all the same to you," says Buster dejectedly, "I think I'll just go to bed now."

Muffy watches with surprise as Buster, his head hanging low, walks into his house. "Hmph!" she complains. "How rude!"

As she walks back toward the limo, she sees a police car driving down the street. In the illumination of the limo's headlights, she thinks she sees Binky riding in the passenger seat next to a police officer. "Huh?"

----

The next morning, the kids are starting to gather in Mr. Ratburn's classroom. Muffy enters the room and walks over to Binky's desk. "What were you doing in a police car last night?" she inquires of him.

"You're the tenth person to ask me that today," says the depressed Binky, "and my answer is the same. I don't want to talk about it."

Then another depressed boy walks into the classroom—Buster. Muffy tries to greet him, but he sits down without a word.

"Buster, I'm really sorry about the alien prank," she says contritely. "I can tell I hurt your feelings..."

Suddenly angry, Binky jumps to his feet. "What...? The aliens were a prank?"

"Yes, a prank that went a little too far, I'm afraid," Muffy admitted.

Binky shakes his fist. "Why, you... If you were a boy, I'd clobber you!"

"Hmph! Excuses, excuses."

Arthur, Francine, and the red-nosed Fern step into the classroom. "Hey, Fern," Muffy welcomes the girl. "How's the old schnozzola?"

"Still pretty sore," Fern answers. "Should be back to normal in a week or so."

"Well, if it doesn't get better by Christmas, then you can be Rudolph."

"Did we ever find out who that girl in the ninja suit was?" wonders Brain, who is seated near the others.

"Not me," says Francine. "I guess she's a friend of Prunella's, but she's too embarrassed to meet us after what happened."

"What did you find out about her, Fern?" Arthur asks.

"I...uh..." Fern begins.

"What?"

"Nothing," Fern lies. "Nothing at all. Didn't learn her name, didn't see her face."

"So, the identity of the ninja girl remains a Halloween mystery," says Brain ominously.

"Yes," says Muffy, "but I have a feeling we'll see her again."

"Maybe she's an alien," says Buster, suddenly smiling.

"Good to have you back with us, Buster," says Arthur with relief.

THE END


End file.
